


I can’t ignore what’s under dance floorboards, the rhythm of my heart a dead-as-disco beat

by asinineAbbreviations



Series: Great Friends [2]
Category: HLVRAI - Fandom, Half Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware, Half-Life
Genre: Blood and Violence, Child Death, Gen, Imaginary Friends, Minor Character Death, Minor Original Character(s), Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-15
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:48:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25915378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asinineAbbreviations/pseuds/asinineAbbreviations
Summary: Gordon has a strange friend.
Relationships: Benrey & Gordon Freeman
Series: Great Friends [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1880761
Comments: 8
Kudos: 34





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I have changed how the previous fic (Great Friends) is laid out. The first chapter is just a oneshot now (again), and the other stuff - which is definitely not going to be as cute - is a separate fic in the same series. So I'm reposting the second chapter from it as the first one to this, and will be updating this one instead.

Gordon spends more time out in the woods after that. Benrey's sometimes there, sometimes not. When questioned, they shrug and say "Got better things to do then look after a, a shit kid all day-" then noogie Gordon when he shoves them.

Sometimes they show Gordon good places to look for animals, sometimes they listen to him ramble about whatever he's fixated on - which often just cycles between what Gordon's just read in his horrible science magazines - and sometimes they just chill in silence. Gordon listens to them talk about stuff too, he's paid attention to what his aunt said about making friends, but Benrey doesn't like talking about themself that much. Gordon knows they're not human, though, and the thought of being friends with an alien or a monster honestly pushes any doubts from his mind when he gets dangerous vibes.

Benrey can apparently turn invisible too? or, at least _appear_ invisible to other people. One time, they were rather close to his back garden - they were playing a game of tig, which was a bit unfair with how long Benrey's legs were, but they often slowed down to make it more fun of a game. Never enough to let him win though, and they always laughed when he huffed and got red in the face. Gordon had tripped over a rock unseen in the longish grass where the garden met the woods, and fell with a thump and a pained cry. This had caused benrey to stop and help him sit up, looking curiously at his reddish bleeding knee like they'd never seen something like that before. It had also caused his aunt to exit through the kitchen doors and come striding over.

For a moment, gordon panicked. Though he'd talked about Benrey to his aunt, he knew she'd just assumed he was made up, and he knew she'd get mad at him for not introducing his friend. However, his fears were unfounded when she completely ignored Benrey. They were still there - Gordon could see the tall being standing near with a vaguely amused expression on his face - but it was as though his aunt couldn't see them at all. When he realised this, he glanced between her and Benrey, and saw that Benrey's face was also slightly surprised. As his aunt finished inspecting his knee and scooped him up, they followed her back towards the house like a puppy.

Gordon's aunt set him down on a chair in the kitchen, and went to one of the cupboards to shuffle through something. Benrey stooped in through the open doors, and peered around the small room with an inquisitive look on their face. Gordon just focused on trying to keep tears in. His knee was scraped quite badly.

"Gordy," his aunt sighed, finally finding the first aid kit she was looking for, "I told you to be careful when playing. If you don't watch it, you could seriously hurt yourself."

Benrey nodded. "Yeah, you can uh, lose all the skin. On your knee."

Gordon paled. "I can lose my skin?"

His aunt shot him a confused look. "You won't lose your skin honey," she said over the sound of Benrey's giggling. gordon pouted at them. "You just don't want to get an infection."

The alien in the room had apparently finished poking around, and wandered back to where Gordon was sitting. They perched on the table and looked down at his knee.

"Oh shi-shoot. that looks like it hurts."

"A little..." Gordon mumbled, quiet enough so his aunt couldn't hear. Tt was a bit strange having two conversations, and he didn't want to end mixing the two up. Benrey nodded with a pensive look on their face, then brightened up a bit.

"I can, can fix that for you gordos," they said. Gordon looked up, a little confused, and then startled as Benrey opened their mouth and several balls of light shot out. He'd only seen them do that once before - when they'd calmed him down the first time. These orbs weren't like the dark blue ones he'd seen before though; they started a light teal colour, before fading into green. They splashed onto Gordon's knee, and right before his eyes, the cuts started closing up and his pain went away. Shocked, he moved his leg a few times. Good as new. Looking up at Benrey, they sported a lopsided grin.

"Feel better?"

"Yeah!" Gordon said. His aunt turned to him again, with a bottle of disinfectant and plasters in one hand, then paused as she saw him. Her brows furrowed.

"I could've sworn you - is your knee okay?" she asked, tilting her head to one side. She knelt down and inspected it again. "I guess i must've mistaken mud for blood or something."

Gordon grinned and hopped off the chair. "I'm fine!" he grinned. His aunt let out a little chuckle.

"Cool," Benrey said. "Now you can, uh, show me around. Gonna need a full tour of this place if i need to protect it." They slid off the table like they were boneless, then restraightened themselves on the floor. Gordon grabbed their hand and wandered off into the living room. His aunt just peered after him, a slightly bemused look on her face.

So, yeah. Benrey could turn invisible. So sometimes they wouldn't play outside, but Gordon would try and set up the playstation so that they could play it without seeming suspicious. They really enjoyed spyro, and absolutely beat Gordon's butt in tekken 3. It was cool though, cause Benrey told him about cheat codes, and helped Gordon through parts in games he couldn't get past. They were a bit weird with some things, like consoles and TV shows, acting like they'd never seen anything like it, and was absolutely enraptured by whatever would play on TV whenever they were in the living room - which was often kiddy programs Gordon's aunt would put on for his brother - but they were always happy to just hang with Gordon.

To be honest, Benrey was the best friend Gordon could ask for. It wasn't that he was hated at school, but he wasn't exactly popular, and his aunt was kinda strict with whose houses he could visit or who could come over. Benrey, who came and went as they pleased, who wouldn't be caught by his aunt, who could beat him one-handed in gran turismo 2, and who could spit magic bubbles, was really cool in Gordon's eyes. Having a cool friend was one thing. Having an alien friend with superpowers was a complete other, and Gordon tried not to be _too_ smug when his aunt asked why he didn't have any friends at school. Who needed to be friends with dumb seven year olds (he disregarded the fact that he, too, was a dumb seven year old) when you could be friends with a literal monster?

The feeling of danger he got never really went away though. When Benrey grinned weirdly, and their sharp teeth are on display, or when they tapped at the buttons on a controller and Gordon could see their claws, something afraid twisted itself in his gut. Benrey wasn't human - they barely acted like it most of the time - and their bizarre features only really accentuated that fact in a scary way. Gordon had seen plenty of documentaries where the large predator easily takes down another animal, biting or clawing it to death, and when he saw Benrey the feeling of being near such a beast was all too apparent. But he still remained safely in the thought that Benrey wouldn't hurt him. They were friends, after all, and Benrey was a big cool.

At least, Gordon thought Benrey wouldn't hurt him at least until what happened near the end of first grade.


	2. School days

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who's afraid of some bullies?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is some violence at the end. Nothing absolutely graphic, but there is minor character death, so look out.

It was around the end of first grade when Gordon started ignoring Benrey. 

\--

He'd known them for quite a while at this point, and honestly he considered them his best friend. They loved playing tig with him and doing science experiments (read: poking different insects and mammals with sticks) together, and sometimes they even pinched his lunch right out from under him. Gordon's aunt was a bit confused by the amount he was seemingly eating, but simply chalked it up to him going through a growth spurt.  
Even though Benrey was strange and alien sometimes, with their bizarre visage and colourful voice, they were content to hang out with a kid like Gordon, which made him a bit excited. None of the other kids at school had a monster friend let alone one that could make themself invisible. It also made him feel special - of all the people Benrey could've befriended, it was Gordon who he chose. He guessed his woody escapades and video game console were enough of a siren call to the alien.

Along with their weird inhuman behaviour, Gordon had also noticed that Benrey was actually very protective of him. If he was ever about to fall over, the tall being would appear and scoop him right up. If he ever got a bruise or a scrape, teal and green orbs would be spat at the injury. On the occasions they followed him to school, they would glare at the teacher when they berated him for not paying attention (because they'd kept up a running commentary about how dumb the class was that'd forced Gordon to muffle his laughter), and grumble nastily at kids who would side-eye Gordon when he got started talking about his interests.

One time, when they were both out hanging around in the woods - Benrey was trying to recollect where this "cool dead possum" he found was, and was leading them both deeper in - when Gordon heard some rustling from the brush in front of them. Both paused, waiting to see what it was. A large grizzly bear, low growl rumbling, emerged from the foliage. Gordon stood deathly still. It was staring straight at him. He felt his breathing quicken, and he was about to run, when he heard an even more fierceful growl emenate from next to him. 

Slowly turning his head to the side, he saw Benrey, hackles raised, with a wide snarl plastered against their face. Immediately Gordon was filled with dread. He wanted nothing more than to run from this horrifying primal beast, but his legs were frozen in place.

However, it seemed that the bear was having similar thoughts too. Its head swung toward Benrey, and it shifted back. Not as though to prepare an attack - moreso acquiescing to Benrey's not-so-silent threat. Moving its gaze back and forth between the two of them - the small child, rooted to the spot, and the alien predator - it made lowed, and turned away.

Upon seeing it retreat, Benrey stopped growling, and turned to look at Gordon with a strange look on their face. The kid was still terrified, and couldn't move away at all.

"Hey, uh, you alright dude?" They asked, squatting down slightly. Gordon just looked at them, a blank expression on wide eyes. Sighing, Benrey hummed a few notes of sweet voice, and a calming blue hit right into the other's face. Gordon blinked a few times, and his chest sagged.

"T-That," he managed to get out after a few tries, "That was so cool!"

Benrey huffed with a pleased grin on their face.

"Your pal Benry's pretty fu- frickin awesome, right? Ain't got to deal with no uhhhhhh cougar."

Gordon giggled, nervousness leaving him with their usual antics. "It was a bear!"

"Wow, don't be so homophobia. You don't know if they were gay," Benrey said in their usual monotone. Gordon could tell they were joking though - he also had trouble with tone too, and being their friend for a long time enough allowed him to parse their opinions on some things pretty easily.

They decided to stay closer to Gordon's back garden for a while after that though. But the thought of Benrey standing up for him, apparently ready to fight a /grizzly bear/, made him smile to himself. He'd got a pretty good friend.

\--

It was nearly summer. One of the last few days of school had Gordon sitting alone in the playground. Benrey had called him a 'square' for not going truant to spend the day with them, and had disappeared to - well, wherever Benrey was when they weren't playing with and/or pestering him. Gordon had tried to explain in his Big Boy Voice that schooling was _very_ important, and that truancy could ruin your career forever, but Benrey had just said he did a terrible impression of his aunt. Which was true, but still made Gordon pout.

Either way, Gordon was by himself, reading a book. Though his aunt had banned him from bringing books to school to read at break - he was supposed to be making 'real' friends, as though Benrey wasn't real - he'd managed to smuggle some in.

It wasn't like Gordon was an outcast. He didn't really have any friends, other than the camaraderie of other left-out kids, and Benrey of course. And with his alien pal often following him to school (often just to dunk on him or the teacher but still) he didn't need friends at school.

Unfortunately, his apparent lack of friends made him a target for teasing quite a lot. Most of the time when Benrey was with him, they'd spit red and white sweet voice at the kids, which normally made them turn tail for whatever reason. When questioned about what that sweet voice meant, Benrey'd shrug and say, "Just means they're whiny babies." Which was honestly good enough for Gordon. Though he was interested in the alien's abilities, when Benrey didn't want to talk about something it was essentially impossible to get them to open up. Gordon had definitely learn that the hard way. They would never tell him how to do the finishing combo in their favourite fighting game.

With Benrey absent for the day however, that meant that getting rid of the kids who'd come up to him was a little more difficult. He'd been pushed around before, yeah, but instead of laying down and just letting the teasing and flicking wash over him, Gordon got annoyed for once.

"Whatcha doin over there, Buttman?" One kid sneered. He was tall and lanky for their age, an ugly grimace painted on his features. Two cronies stood behind him with mean smiles. "Can you even read like that four-eyes?"

Gordon snapped his book shut, glaring at him. "I bet I can read better than _you_ can," he snarled. Lowering his voice with a growl was an intimidation tip he'd gotten from Benrey. It _wasn't_ quite as effective on a skinny 7 year old as it was an inhuman monster, and it only served to make the kids hounding him laugh nastily.

"Ohh, Buttman here thinks he's better than us?" the leader said. He walked closer to Gordon, raising a hand and shoving him harshly backwards. "Let's see who can-"

He was cut off as, with a yell, Gordon leapt up and at him, fingers outstretched and raking down his face. The kid howled, moving a hand to his red cheek, before throwing a punch that landed right in Gordon's eye. Dazed, Gordon stood still and blinked for a moment, before the two other boys rushed him, grabbing at him. One gave him a nasty chinese burn, and the other one tore his glasses away from him.

Blindly Gordon swung out, managing to hit one in the chest with his free arm. The world just a blur of colours, he started kicking towards what he assumed was the main kid and smirked satisfied as he heard a hurt cry. That look was wiped off when a loud crrack resounded and pain burst from his nose. Gordon yanked his arm free, clutching at his face, feeling blood dripping down past his mouth. Just as he looked up to see his assailants getting closer, a shout stopped them all dead.

"WHAT DO YOU BOYS THINK YOU'RE DOING?"

\--

The corridor outside the principals office was stuffy, the school district being too stingy to properly pay for aircon, but luckily Gordon was cooled down by the ice pack he was holding to his face. After a quick trip to the nurses office, where his nose and glasses were both declared broken, he was directed by the teacher that had broken the fight up to sit down with the other kids and wait for their guardians to arrive. They were shooting nasty looks at him, which he tried his hardest to ignore, but couldn't help the hot feeling of shame curling up in his gut.

That feeling intensified as his aunt walked briskly into the corridor, one arm holding Gordon's baby brother up, the other clenched tightly. She paused slightly on seeing Gordon's face, her hand darting to the ice pack. Gordon winced as she lifted it up to inspect the damage underneath.

"A fight?" She said. "Gordy, I thought you were better than that."

Gordon averted his eyes. "Sorry auntie," he mumbled ashamedly. His aunt sighed, then grabbed his hand.

"We're going home. Your teacher told me you've been suspended for a week for fighting, and we are going to have some words later about deescalation."

"De-what?"

Gordon's aunt smiled a little. "Never mind. Let's go home, Gordy."

With that, she led him out of the building. Gordon turned back to stick his tongue out at the other boys one last time, before following his aunt back to her car.  
The ride home was terse. John started burbling a bit, and Gordon had to pat him a few times to get him to quiet down. His aunt often looked up at him through the rearview mirror, a worried expression on her face.

When they reached the house, Gordon's aunt got him and his brother out of the car, and paused.

"Go play outside for a bit," she said. "I've got to get John back to sleep, then do a bit of work. But you and I are going to have a talk before dinner, okay?"  
Surprised, Gordon nodded, and rushed inside to deposit his schoolbag before throwing open the kitchen door and running out to the back garden. It was earlier in the day than he'd usually get home from school, so he wasn't sure if Benrey would be there.

But sure enough, there they were, lounging against a tree, flicking buttons on a small handheld device. Though they definitely heard Gordon coming, they only looked up at him when he was a few feet away.

"You're here earl-"

Benrey paused on seeing Gordon's face. His eye was forming a nasty bruise, and a trail of blood was still visible from his nostrils, along with the other smaller scratches he had on him. Their expression contorted for a moment, and their head suddenly jerked to the side and let out a stream of bubbles that faded from black to red. As soon as it all seemed to be out of their system, they turned back to Gordon with an unreadable expression on their face.

"What happened?" Benrey demanded. Their usual monotone and speech-style was gone, replaced with an anger that Gordon knew (felt) wasn't directed at him. Still, the change in the alien's demeanour sent a shiver down his spine.

"Some stupid kids at school," Gordon said, sniffing then gagging as the scent of blood went right up his nose. "Tried to push me around. Got 'em right back."

Hearing this, Benrey grinned, sharp teeth glinting in the sunlight. "Hell yeah," he said, tone less harsh. "Gordos goin ham. Gordon Fightman."

Gordon snorted, then winced as once again some blood spurted of out his nose. He really needed to stop with the nose expressions.

They sat still for a moment, letting the gentle breeze carry the sound of the nearby brook towards them. Then, Benrey turned off their device and stood up.  
"Wanna go find some uh, some frogs?"

"Heck yeah."

\--

They had wandered a bit farther from Gordon's backyard - not towards the woods, but laterally, heading towards town, just walking along the other houses whose gardens backed onto the woods. Gordon didn't exactly want another brush with a grizzly anytime soon. 

Following along the brook, trying to listen out for croaks and looking for any movement that might be amphibian-related, Gordon listened to Benrey rambling on about whatever it was that had piqued their interest this time. Apparently, it was Air Bud. They were talking about something, most of it going over Gordon's head, but he caught something about a perfect soda being good at baseball? A lot of things Benrey talked about tended to go over his head, if not because their speech was incomprehensible half the time, and the other half they were referencing things Gordon had no idea about. Still, it was a nice thing to listen to friends, and he wouldn't lie if Benrey's voice had a bit of a soothing quality to it.

The nice Friend Time was interrupted however when a familiar yell reached Gordon's ears. He looked up from the brook to see the three kids from before, jeering at him. They were standing a little ways away, a bit deeper into the woods than where Gordon and Benrey were standing.

"Who're they?" Benrey asked disinterestedly. He had an impassive look on his face. Gordon huffed.

"The jerks at school who hit me," he muttered, glaring at them. Benrey's head snapped towards him, then back to the kids, a dark look on his face.

"So these uh, these aholes are the ones that decided to beat down on you, on my bro?"

"Yeah. It's not fair," Gordon whined. "I got a weeks suspension, and they just got a few days."

The leader, the scrawny kid, yelled down at him. "Who are you talking to buttman? Your imaginary boyfriend?" They laughed amongst each other. Gordon coloured, face screwing up in a grimace. He walked towards them, vaguely aware of Benrey following along him silently.

"Don't call me that!" He shouted. "Stop being such an - an a-hole!"

The kid in front of him sneered. "Oh yeah? And who's gonna stop me, _dumb_ man?" He raised a hand out as though to punch him, when he stopped dead in his tracks. The colour in his face disappeared as a terrified look gripped him. Gordon paused, then turned to see Benrey standing besides him with a menacing aura.

"Are you messing with my Gordo?" They spat, a few sweet voice orbs floating out, the same black and red Gordon had seen before. The kids all cringed away, clearly frightened, but the leader gulped and tried to stand his ground.

"Y-yeah, so?" He wavered. "We could beat you and - and lameman any day of the week!"

" _Prove it._ " Benrey growled. Their voice was low, lower than Gordon had ever heard before, and hearing it set off so many scared messages in his head that he was stuck once again, having to watch the whole situation play out. He wasn't afraid of Benrey - well, maybe a little - and he knew that the alien wouldn't hurt him, at least so long as Gordon didn't try to attack them, but the wave of relief he felt over Benrey moving in to protect him was drowned out by the chanting in his head that told him something terrible was going to happen. It was impossible for him to even tell if it was his own brain screaming at him, or if some cosmic force was beaming the knowledge right into his head. Little good it did him though, rooted to the ground as he was.

Lifting his arm once again, the leader of the kids aimed a punch at Gordon. His fist was shaking slightly, and his face was a combination of terror, anger, and nervousness. It was silent as he wound his arm back, but as he started to release the punch, his fist was suddenly caught in a pale hand twice the size of his own. Benrey had moved in front of Gordon, inhumanly fast, and caught the fist before it could get anywhere near his friend. They leant down so their face was on the same level as the kid in front of him. The angle the two were standing at made it a bit difficult for Gordon to see what Benrey's face looked like, but seeing the leader and the other kids' faces made him happy that he couldn't.

_"Wrong. Move."_

What happened next was a blur to Gordon. He couldn't remember it properly, just - just red and screaming. It was only once all the horrific ripping sounds and gurgles had died down that he could see the scene in front of him. Mangled bodies on a heap. Viscera. Blood staining the ground, clothes, shoes. A horrible sight of human misery and death. And in the middle of it all, Benrey, taller and more beastial than they usually were. Their claws dripped a mix of liquid, blood, pus, water, and plinked into the puddles along the ground. The security outfit and vest they usually sported were ripped where Benrey's body had contorted, and hung loosely where the tears were. A round metal object - Gordon unconsciously recognising it as Benrey's helmet - lay on the ground, covered in blood. Benrey's hair, long, dark, and ragged, trailed down their back. At the sound of Gordon's harsh intake, they turned around. Their face was gone - in its place a black void filled with eyes, colours incomprehensible to Gordon's brain, all _looking_ at him, _knowing_ , seeing right through him, seeing his fear and confusion and _horror_. Gordon's head exploded with pain, but he couldn't turn away.

He stood shellshocked, unable to tear his eyes away from his best friend. His best friend, who had just - just killed - k-

Benrey made a move towards him.

Gordon passed out.


End file.
